kbetray

i don't understand. exchanging solemn glances, fake smiles, and ignorant glares are no longer sufficient. if you'd like me to lie to you as you feel is necessary, i will. i will do it just as you do and hear the rest later. i will never tell you i'm sorry or admit blame. i will never wonder if i did something wrong or confront you. i will lie through my teeth and plaster a fake grin on my face. my eyes will display no sorrow and they will not shine with the pity of tears. i will fight you with every weapon i have and i will never let you know. i will make you cry yourself to sleep and i will make you feel every dagger i have f

I mumble the history of childish experiences Hoping to pull you back To when you were different. For today Your lips no longer breathe the quintessence of infancy Or the dynamism of junior high. Today They whisper the sounds of acceptance Infidelity Avariciousness And lust. They exhale the euphoria of nothing And instead Replace it with qualms And tears And blood. The echoes of your silence Do not falter And though I exhale the innocence Of forgotten solitude I am only joking. It is you that has forgotten.

I hold in my words Until they can't be held in anymore. Until they explode with the brilliance of fire- Teeming with the passion of night- Stealing the lines of the kings of suave- Breathing the breath of those that came before. The fervor of my phrases comes out With the poise of only the greatest of egoists And the vividness of the last memory of a lost love. They exhale the ecstasy of a thousand desires Granted by the hands of gods. But they shouldn't. The ardor should be absent as the smile of the desolate And the intensity replaced with a subtle grin of delight. The elegant bliss exchanged with an honest moment too awkward

I sit down and write you a letter. I pour into it the passion of star-crossed lovers And the verve of the fearless Recreating the fierce emotions Crying to be set free. Destroying the names of those before you And those to come And releasing the clandestine breaths Never to be breathed. Miming the stories of the arduous gods And fashioning a tale of verve From the bottled sentiments- Admitting the fervor Of a hopeless child Determined to succeed. The note teems with the brilliance of newfound desire And the poise of record-holders among the deities. And then I tear it up. Destroying the whispers of forgotten solitude And

I have no response. My words no longer possess the vigor of the late hours of night The poise of gods Or the brilliance of the last line on the page. Today, they're missing the passion of a long-awaited embrace The verve of love-seeking phantoms And the harmony of the whispers of lovers. They lack the fervor of wealthy kings And instead feel contrite and penitent. They have the vim of a betrayed aficionado And the vitality of unwanted roses. Today I have no witty retort. It is not because you told me you loved me. It is because you told me you loved me And I realized you weren't him.